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Why know behaviors styles and communication preferences? What difference does it make?
What is the value in learning and understanding styles? So you and I can adapt our behavior and "speak the other person's language." Why? The bottom line is to communicate more effectively!
The purpose is to see clearly how people might view you and how they can and do perceive and interpret your behavior. The intent is for you to grow to maturity personally and in your relationships in order to develop your total potential.
By learning how we behave and how others behave we can see why others respond and react to us as they do. We can tend to think to our selves, "Don't they see I am trying to help?" By first knowing your own style, you will have a realistic view of yourself and how others might see you!
Each of us thinks our behavior is just what the situation calls for. Why? Because we know our own intentions. Our behaviors make sense to us.
You know your own intentions, but others only know what they see … your behavior! We tend to judge ourselves by our intentions and judge others by their behavior. We therefore, judge others' intentions by their behavior. We may say to ourselves "If I were behaving that way my intentions would be . . . therefore they must be doing that for the same reason."
In our daily interactions with each other most problems are not really problems! What? It's true! Most problems are misunderstandings! Why? Because we don't really listen. We don't hear! We don't hear what others are saying from their perspective; we hear from our own perspective. We listen from our own perspective, from our own point of view and through our own filters and our own view of life.
How do we help all this? By first understanding our own preferred behavioral style as we learn about others preferred style of behavior. By understanding another's style we can learn how they view the world from their perspective.
Learning the behavioral styles is like learning the other person's language.
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